Wodless Wednesday, A day at the Park

It's fall in Charleston, as you can see the whole city has a haze over it. the clear summer days has passed, but still, its Charleston. History mixes with a day in the park.

What a great City we live in.

Denise and the Cat...

Monday Morning. Today started normal. Tasha running through the house, waking up the family which is her self appointed job to do, I have the strong desire to fire her from this position, but what can you do?

Anyway, Denise was feeling rather industrious  after her morning wake up call, so at 8:30 in the morning she gthered her laundry together and went outside to the laundry room. Now I should explain, that in Charleston, the laundry rooms are separate rooms outside of the house but still attached. Ours is off the patio to the left. So while Denise is busily stuffing clothes in the washing machine she hears a samll faraway mew.

Now our cat has been missing for three days, so she was a little excited about hearing the sound she thought it was our cat. So she starts seaching, The Laundry room is the cats favorite place to sleep and hang out. She moves clothes, looks under boxes checks the dryer. No Kitty. She deciides she must have been dreaming.

Steps out side the door and  hears it again. She starts searching the back yard
looking uder bushes ,in the old dog house and  no cat. Just when she thinks she is losing her mind....she decides to go in the house

After heading in the house, yet a third time she hears the meow again this time a tad more urgently.

So,she heads off in the direction of the the sound, which is coming from the back of the yard still no cat  but she notices the dogs in the neighbor yard, who live catty corner to us, are barking uproariously at something, looking up in the tree she sees the cat. up the tree with two dogs standing guard below it.

Well, now we know where the cat has been for three days.

Denise come rushing in the house, excited I found the cat. She yells excitedly.

"Where" I ask

"Two dogs ran her up a tree"

Oh.

So, we go out and try to coax the cat down, the neighbor has an electric fence so we cannot climb the fence, I got a ladder, Denise tried to climb the tree with the ladder...ladder was too short.

The kitten has now seen us and is going wild, trying to decided if we could save her from the dogs should she jump.

Probably not a good idea.

Luckily the neighbor came out, she has a friend who had an extension ladder so she's off to call the friend to bring the ladder.

and while she is doing that......

The kitty trots down the tree on the other side right into Denises' arms.

Nothing like a cat to cause problems. Denise is happy, gleefully hugs the kitty, the kitty is shaking for minute then starts to purr......

We bring her in the house, she rushes for the kitty box. Can you imagine not going to the Bathroom for three days? THEN she eats and drinks and...........
asks to goout, yet agin..out you go.
try to stay away from dogs and trees this time.
The cat looks at me like I am nuts.

One day we need toname this cat

And so it goes....

Children's bill of Rights

I have a right to live rather than merely exist.
I have a right to personhood rather than being an object of possession.
I have a right to equality with every other human being regardless of age.
I have a right to be respected as a human being.
I have a right to be uniquely myself with my own identity.
I have a right to speak my thoughts and feelings, and to be heard.
I have a right to ask "why?" and to receive an answer.
I have a right to receive discipline without insults, yelling and put-downs.
I have a right to be encouraged to grow to maturity at my own pace.
I have a right to be free of physical harm at the hands of others.
I have a right to be loved for who I am.
I have a right to think for myself and, with guidance, to make my own decisions.
I have a right to be responsible for myself.
I have a right to feel joy, happiness, sorrow, bereavement, and pain.
I have a right to my acheivements and a right to my mistakes.
I have a right to care and be cared for, to give and to receive.
I have a right to develop my own convictions, beliefs and standards.
I have a right to know and experience personal freedom.
I have a right to my own body, mind, and spirit.
I have a responsibility to recognize and accept the rights of others regarding their Bill Of Rights.

I just wanted to share this.

This is a quiet Sunday. We wanted to visit a new church last night but ended up not getting to go because of the truck.

So I am kicking back and just enjoying the day. Tomorrow is another day. I'll tackle the world tomorrow.

Small Talk six saturday

Another Small talk six..What every happened to this week? It is now Saturday again and this week small talk six is...6 things you love or hate about your neighbors.....Thank you ladies at Momdot.

The issue here is I don't know my neighbors...sooo hmm. I am going to talk about former neighbors I loved or er didn't love.

1. I hate when neighbors burn leaves. This is really prevalent here in Charleston. They either use a fn or something, but it is always pointed directly toward the house.....Yes my house. So I can't use my deck without choking.

2. having a BBQ and not inviting me. I mean really...

3. Kids running in my yard. I have a neighbor who cuts across my grass going to the neighbor on the other side. Not generally, but I can see him pass my porch and walk through my flowers. Boo.

4. I love the fact the neighbor ran over and welcomed me to the neighborhood when I was getting my mail the first day. I thought it was sweet. But she didn't bring cookies. :)

5. I love the fact none of my neighbors feel they have to share their music with me. In my old neighborhood the people down the road thought I'd enjoy their music even though I was 4 houses down. Surprise. I didn't.

6. I like the fact even though we donot chat and carry on, I know my neighbors look out for me and our neighborhood.

Digging myself out

There are days when everything piles up on you and as you stand there peeking over the edge, just thankful there is light at the top of the pile: you get that phone call or visit that totally blocks the light. There you stand, wondering if you will ever see daylight again.

I have had a week like that, and I am still searching for a little light. Isn't it funny how things happen, then happen and then happen????

I guess it is all in how you handle things. It is when we get to the point we are feeling to much in control of our lives, God has to remind us it is HIM not us calling the shots.

So I am sorting out the surprises I have had this week and the little catastrophes and setting them in the hands of our Lord.

In the meantime, I have stopped peeking over the edge of the mountain looking for daylight and am dealing with it, a piece at a time.

Sometimes, well most of the time, I think we get overwhelmed by the mountain, and it seems to large.

So I am starting one piece at a time. Hopefully I will dig myself out. In the meantime, have a nice day

Wordless Wednesday Downtow Charleston

Downtown Charleston Harbor

Small Talk Six: Fall

Small Talk Six: What do you love or hate about Fall?

Thanks to the moms at MomDot, Drop by and see more entries....

I love the change of Seasons This is Fall in Virginia

I love Fall Fashion This outfit is soooo me.

I like he heartier fall foods....

Hokie football...YES! as well as my 49er's

Colder Crisper weather

Fall in Charleston

Fall Decorations.

Children, Tantums, and Natasha

One of my kids shared an incident with me a while back. They told me about a time they were scribbling on a piece of paper pretending they were doing "cursive" we called it in those days.

They ran up and showed it to their Dad, who shot them down with a word: that's not cursive, that's just scribbling. they were devastated and still 24 years later remember and hear the words as if it were today.

I didn't remember the incident, but got as angry at there dad today, as if I had been then, had I known I probably would have popped him on the head. I had to do that a lot with him. Sensitive was not his forte and kids also were not, Although he loved his kids, he hadn't any idea how to handle them.

I know he didn't mean it, but it was so hurtful that the child remembers it today.

Tasha has had what I call a Brat day. She has whined, and cried, and shouted MINE MINE so many times I have almost taken every toy, book, blanket and item of clothing she owns away from her. Well not really, but she has had a day. I tell her on these days she is acting like Stingy on Lazy Town. She pouts at that she doesn't like Stingy, and knows he is not a nice person.

I had a flashback for a few minutes, I was picking up Eric and on his way home he decided he wanted Taco Bell, and of course brought Tasha a Taco,Which was left in the bag while he munched on his nachos. Tasha ungraciously told him not to eat HER taco, in such a rude manner I thought it was another child was in the back seat. I just looked at her, and took in the tired cranky look and started to scold her a little, Eric intervined, explained to her he wouldn't eat her Taco but it wasn't hers yet it was a gift and he hadn't given it to her yet. He was careful to be kind. Good for him. Because what she really needed was a swat.

Kids go through all kinds of stages, and at the age of "almost 4" the brat stage is pretty common. I am glad Eric remembered she was only 3 1/2.

I saw a parent in the grocery store the other day, apparently her child was having a brat day as well. She was trying to crawl out of the basket, throwing a total fit. How that mom remained calm, I don't know but when he was settled and stopped, the mom said in a low voice, "You know whats going to happen when we get home, right?"

The child sniffing looked up and said a spanking? she nodded yep. a good one.

I had to smile, but the child knew his consequences,and that's a plus. The mom kept her cool. I liked that, however, I don't want to be at her house or any where near when they get home.

I started this because I was thinking about Lavender during all of these little episodes. What could she had done so horribly that her mother would beat her to death?

Tasha can throw a fit mind you,, she can scream, yell, kick hollar with the best of them (I just don't take pictures on those days maybe someday I should) but we just wait her out. I have a naughty chair she hates, that I put her in.

After on such exhausting episode Eric told me, I can really understand child abuse, then he laughed and said not really.

But really. On some days you can understand how a parent can get to the point, but jumping off is what I don't understand. I'd cut off my hand before hurting my, or anyone elses child.

Speaking of Walmart, when I worked there I say a mother terribly deriding her child, yelling calling him names, really threatening her life. I grabbed another associate and walked over to her offered her a cup of coffee in the break room. While the other associate watched the child.

After she calmed down, mom and son were reunited, but with the added advantage of knowing how she looked to people. She left apologizing and contrite. I wasn't trying o humiliate her I just wanted her to calm down, but she went to the store manager a week later and told her, she had started getting help. She just didn't realize she was out of control.

Can we all help an out of control mom? Maybe that's the key. Maybe that would have saved Lavender. Maybe we should not turn our heads and hope things will be ok. Do you know an overwhelmed mother?

And do it goes...

Angel

Charleston Fall, Yo Gabba GAbba..Random Sunday

Charleston woke up this morning in a haze. The first sign I have that fall is here, is not the changing leaves, or a chill in the air: although it is less warm, but the wonderful haze and mist that drifts over Charleston every morning, a little like what my mother used to call "angel tears" because it is a soft mist. Just obscuring your vision as you drive slightly, and making you turn on your wipers intermittently rather then all of the time.

The mist along with the wonderfully horrible smell of the Marsh, that waifs over Charleston along with the early morning smell of fish as the fishing boats unload their catch, all tell me welcome to fall in Charleston. Thats right Charleston smells. The entire city reeks of Marsh life and freshly caught fish. But if you eat in just one of our safood resturants, you get over the smell quickly.

I was thinking this morning how much of summer I actually missed. The truth is I don't know how I missed it I was here, but so wrapped up in working, always thinking I had tomorrow to do something, the summer slipped away and it is almost the middle of September.

You would think I would know better. me of all people who woke up one morning with two children instead of three should remember the fleeting value of time. Especially with the lives of our love ones.

So today is Sunday, I have for many Sundays been wanting to do so many thing. It is a shame to live in a city like Chuck Town and not enjoy it, and tomorrow is promised to absolutely no one.

remember that.

But I am not going to be all serious, this is a Non blogging day and I know everyone is at church and with family, well most everyone is. I'm not, not that I am playing hooky today,..oh OK, yes I am playing hooky. Denise is working a double shift because her Denny's is having the honor of hostin the Rev. Jesse Jackson in a publicity stunt. I won't go there and how I feel about a man who is supposed to be a man of God using a restaurant to raise Money for...well, never mind.

So Today, I am dedicating to Tasha. The grownups in Tasha's life love her to death but so much so, we often get to busy providing for her and making sure she is safe and happy, we forget to spend time with Tasha just listening to her.

Tasha has a lot to say, and has no problems saying it. She told her mom yesterday she wanted to go to the petting zoo, it had been a long time since she had been there. she told me her mom was going to see a friend and I had to take care of her. Period. I guess there are no choices in Tasha's life. It is still black and white no shades of gray.

But this morning Tasha told me about Tudi on Yo Gabba Gabba, Now I am not a fan of Yo Gabba Gabba I think it is one of the strangest shows on TV, but kids are like sponges and absorbed.

Tasha has had a problem with bugs. She hates flies, she hated ladybugs. She was bitten by fireants so all ants are bad.

But, as was explained to me today, Tudi didn't like bugs. She was scared and didn't want to pick them up. and Tudi was crying. Tasha really related to this. So, the Yo Gabba Gabba crew of robots, carefully explained how bugs were good for the earth (no, I don't understand this since they are supposed to live in outer space) but any way, Tasha told me that bugs were our friends and because Tudi wasn't afraid anymore, she wont beeither. So we met a fly, and all she said was Hi fly instead of Shoo Fly go away from me, which I taught her to say.

I sat and listen to this whole saga of Tudi and bugs, including Tasha's rendition of "Don't be afraid" a song that resonates in my head for hours after I hear it: and I became thoughtful.

Children pick up so much, I always thought Tasha would outgrow the fear of bugs, if we were just patient,but Tudi cured her. We really do have to pay attention to what our kids watch, it effects them. So,my campaign to kill yo Gabba Gabba is on hold because he aparently does good in an annyoying way, and thank Tudi for her fear of Flies.

Happy Sunday All, and I shall stop Rambling...

Angel

The Picture is "the end of anothr day and the beauty that surrounds us"

Painter is Katherine M. Schneider

Six small things saturday....

oday’s topic is “6 things you think would be yummy if they were covered in chocolate.” You can answer this with a list of 6 words, 6 phrases, 6 sentences, 6 paragraphs, 6 photos, 6 videos, etc . . .

1. pretzels

2. cherries

3. apples

4. potato chips

5. any fruit

6. coconut

Americans and Apathy

oday is 9/11 and I actually do not have a lot to say. We have come so far since that day. But we have come the wrong way.

I remember how we came to gather. I remember how flags flew everywhere, it didn't matter who you were that day or the day after or the day after.

When did we forget and it become distant again?

We all want to live the American dream, and whats wrong with that? When did Americans NOT care about two cars a house and a boat. Or for that instance Roosevelt's proverbial; two chickens in every pot analogy....

When?

July 5, 1776

December 8 1941

September 12, 2001

We cared about America and Americans on these days, and we were ready to protect her.

We were angry at being attacked.. Remember how you cheered when our soldiers left? Well, heads up people they are still there. They are htere because the job is not done.

Why aren't you cheering now?

Rmember the Slogans?

These colors don't run.

Don't worry, we are on our way

Dome mess with Americans.

Where are they now?

The media has a lot to say about the other side, but what about our guys?

When you look at your kids, or any kids do you want them to grow up in a post 9/11 world?

The one where we are so busy arguing about America we forget we are the Americans?

I am sorry folks, it wasn't a hoax. It happened. And if we are not careful it Will happen again. Not because there are Muslims in our country but because we are once again suffering from Apathy. We have exchanged awareness for prejudices. We ave looked for something or someone else to blame. We are worried about being politically correct that we are not watching what is happening.

We are forgetting the next attack could be on your kids. Your, mine ours. There wasn't a yours on 9/11 it was ours. Americas.

Wheres your flag? It flew in 2001 where is it today?

Apathy led us to Dec 7 and to 9/11 don't let apathy lead us on to something worse.

I believe wehave a president who is doing more to demorilize our country, then upliftit.

and you see these guys below this line? They are over there so I can state that.

God Bless America

Wordless Wednesday: Mothers and Daughters

September 7th How do you survive the loss of a child?

It started out as a normal day, As normal as the first day of school could be.

I feel I said a lot of no's that day. They resound in my head, and i have never been able to put them to rest.

We went shopping for new clothes on Sunday. The people from the church had given her lots of money, so new life, new clothes. She had just had surgery, it was successful so life was assured, right? It was supposed to be downhill from here.

She came out and showed me her new jeans and shirt.

Can I wear them? No, lets save them for church, they look too nice.

We were just hanging around the house, why get them dirty.

Can we have fried apples for dinner?

No Dinner is ready, we'll have them tomorrow.

There wasn't going to be a tomorrow or a church day. To this day I can't prepare fried apples, or eat them.

I buried her in her jeans.

How could I know?

The night before she had asked me, What happens when you die? And I told her: You simply wake up with Jesus.

Did she know something I didn't?

She died, in my arms, I felt the Angel take her, or maybe it was Jesus Himself. I felt her spirit go home.

Days go buy I still feel her in my arm and my spirit. I know she is with Jesus, but, it doesn't help because I am selfish. I want her here.

I would give so much to get my child back, those who willingly throw away their children baffle me.

You don't know God's plan, only He does. Love your child, hug him or her: don't count on tomorrow, Today may be all you have. That is for all of us.

How do you survive the loss of a child? one day at a time.

I still miss you Sharon. I can't wait to see you again.

Love

Mom

Just a note

Happy Labor day, ya'll

Speak For Lavendar-Silenced forever

This is a copy of another blog. This little girl was murdered, Help stop it from happening again.

I cry every time things like this happened...No child should suffer...please take a moment and fill out the form for the DA, and link to Ohilda's blog. It breaks my heart I would give my own life to get Sharon's back...Please help see this doesn't happen again....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KJgP1BE3eF4

Dear Friends,

I, along with a group of other adoptive moms, have become worried that without a grieving family to push the District Attorney's office, Lavender's case might very well be swept under the rug. We very much want the DA to know that Lavender has a huge adoptive family who grieves for her and just as we fought for her to come home, we will fight to have her voice heard.

In this effort, we have come up with a plan to write the DA's office to expressour strong desire for justice to be served in this case.

Please join us in writing the DA either via the online form by clicking HERE. * You do NOT have to have adopted or even be a Mom or Dad to write. You only have to know in your heart that this little girl was WRONGED and justice needs to be served.

Please have the subject read: "Justice for Lavender Banks".

We have written the following statement to express our wishes to the DA:

----------------------------------------------------------

Dear District Attorney Jan Scully,

This letter is to urge your office to seek justice for Lavender Banks, who diedon May 2, 2008. Her mother, Sabrina Banks, stands accused of her murder. We, as an adoption community, banded together to support Sabrina Banks when she wanted to adopt Lavender from China. This same community grieves for the loss of Lavender and demands that those responsible for her death be brought to justice. Sabrina Banks has had her time to talk. Now, finally, it is little Lavender's turn.

----------------------------------------------------------

Please feel free to use this statement and/or add your personal thoughts. We just want to make sure that the DA knows that there are many people who would like to see justice done in this case.

Help spread the word! You are more than welcome to link to this page, post it on your blog, online forums, FaceBook, or any group that you may belong to. We need to show the DA's office how very important this issue is to the adoption community and how much sweet Lavender's life mattered.

Thank you for being a voice for this angel!

Small talk 6 6 jobs.....

Yoo Hoo it's Saturday! Small talk six 6 jobs yout hink it would be a blast to have...

Brought to you by the wonderful mom over at MomDot Make sure you drop over there to see more!

1. I have always wanted to be the first women Naval avaitor and fly ariplanes off carriers, What a Blast..there are plenty of them now but I still wish...

2. A cardio vascular surgeon for children...a pediatric cardiolgist

3. teacher oh yeah I was one....

4. A race car driver....Yes thats right NASCAR..

5. an engineer - so I can build buildings...bridges

6. a airline pilot for Southwest, I used to wat "Airline" on A&E all the time..LOVED It

Not a carrier but a ship.... make sure you drop by momdot, you hear?

Childhood dramas or tramua

Denise got one of her first parental shocks this week. She found Tasha sitting on the floor among shards of sheared hair. SCissors in hand.Denise did what any strong, loving tough, fair minded, minded mom would do.

She cried.

Tash's hair is like her crowning glory. It is long, thick, soft and beautiful. The only time it is annoying iswhen you are combing it out and it has somehow gotten tangled, Then I feel like cutting it off myself.

I didn't have the heart to tell her this was just the first of many child induced tears.

For instance: The time Eric wanted to help his dad with the BBQ and threw additional fluid it on the already burning coal, and singed his eyebrows off his face.

For Instance: the time Denise and Eric decided to jump off the roof of the garage while paying, something right now I don't remember what. I just remember children flying through the air.

After picking up my heart off the floor, I went over to see them only to find them giggling.

I almost went to bed for a week.

For instance: Eric calling me from a park to tell me he was playing spotlight and was stuck in a train tunnel and was calling me to say good by. I yelled at him to get out of that tunnel or I would kill him, then jumped in my car to drive to the park only to find no one there. They went calmly back to their friends house for snack. And to discuss thie adventure, fter getting out of the tunnel. After seeing the tunnel and where he was, he almost did die that day twice, once by train and once by mom, , and I almost went to jail. After I hugged him of course.

For instance: Denise going skiing, and slipping and shattering her knee. Her dad called me described her symptoms and asked me if he should take her to the hospital. No, I said, we'll do the surgery at home. Score one for sarcasim. The interesting thing is as she was explaining to me the accident, she never actually got on skis, but was injured while putting them on, to add insult to injury, the young man trying to help her up in his concern, dropped his skies on her head making it almost comical if it hadn't been so tragic. He felt horrible, but all I could do was laugh.

When he came up to me miserably to apologize at church the following Sunday I assured him it was all right, but still giggled.Stress I guess. He finally saw the humor in his fumbling over her trying to help her up and taking her out with his skis instead. No harm done. But she survived, I hope he did. The knee still gives her some trouble even until today, but she still likes to ski.

Did you every wonder how kids survive childhood? Better yet, how do we? With a sense of humor thats how.

Angel

Childhood survivors

Wordless Wedneday _ Places to go, people to see

Wordless Wed brought to you by the ladies at MomDot